To Be Responsible Is An Art

It was rejoicing moment for Mr. Madhukar who got promoted from Area Sales Manager to Country head of a reputed IT firm. His excitement had no limits. Tears of joy rolled out of his eyes and he thought of sharing this news with his dearest friend, life partner and his inspiration – his wife Ms. Parvati.

On hearing the sweet voice from other end of the phone call, Madhukar voice choked. He cleared his throat and shared the reason for making the call to his wife. Parvati congratulated but Madhukar felt the dryness in her congratulation. He felt the cold sweat on his brow. He had nothing more to say so had disconnected the call. I rang him and reminded him about the meeting at coffee shop at 7 pm, which he confirmed and said that there is a good news which he is going to share when we meet.

Over three months Madhukar was in my regular contact. He felt that though he is performing extremely well in his professional career, still he feels there is something that is missing in his life. He is getting deprived of his true happiness. He always gets irritated while in company of his friends. He enjoys his loneliness and has started to avoid even interaction with other family friends or relatives.

To know more about the change in Madhukar’s behavior, I fixed up my appointment with his wife after taking his consent. Before giving any further suggestion, I thought to know the root cause of the problem. I met Parvati who looked absolutely dejected. There was no sign of charm. On inquiring, she shared with me the schedule which was followed by Madhukar.

Due to the pressure of work and demand of his position, Madhukar often had restless nights. He often had to work till late night, foregoing the mental peace and had never cared of his health. Being his better-half, Parvati has taken ample care of her husband and also was struggling to keep the cord tight and in harmony with other family friends and relatives. She had to attend the family functions, different ceremonies either with her two kids or sometimes alone, when her children were bit occupied due to their exams or activities of their school.

With huge tear drops in her eyes, I could sense the hidden pain that was whirling in her heart. She recalled and said that Madhukar has turned such a work-alcoholic that he stopped sharing anything with her. There was a huge silence which disturbed my mind. I knew that if Madhukar fails to understand his wife’s problem, very soon, he will be left alone. He may lose his best friend and his life partner for ever.

It was time for me to talk to Madhukar. We planned to meet in a coffee shop at 7 pm. Like other times, he got stuck with his work so badly that my meeting time had to shift from 7 pm to 9 pm. With three cups of coffee, in the past two hours, I made up my mind to listen to Madhukar and explore for the right way out for his problem.

My mind questioned my heart, “Is it so necessary for anyone to work so hard?” and “What is the significance of all this turmoil in our life?”

Well, I believed we all live our life with certain aspirations and work hard dexterously to fulfill our dreams and desires. When someone supports us, we feel, he or she will stand beside me for every time and will render his or her support which can aid in facing challenges with more vigor and power. What we tend to forget is, we think only about self. We have failed to focus on other dimensions and even have neglected others whom we actually consider as a part of our journey, but in fact they are not.

Deeply engrossed in my thoughts, still my eyes were focused at the door of the coffee shop, waiting for Madhukar. At 9.10 pm, I saw him entering the shop. Though he looked tired, I greeted him loudly and acknowledged him for his seamless work spirit. My sentence hit the right cord. He coldly shared about his position but also added on that the happiness that he felt when he received his first promotion was more valuable than being the country head.

Time management is really very important and critical. Madhukar had always put on priority his professional life. He hardly cared for his personal life. May be, he was running short of time but there are many people on this beautiful planet who are titled as successful but at the same time, have given significance to their social and family relationship. He ultimately realized the fact.

Nothing is too late. I cheered him and said, let us plan for a party on forth coming Sunday. I told him to call every fellow friend, new or old and his relative personally. Share the happy moment and for future plan for a weekend tour - at least every month, so that he can spend gala time with his family. I suggested him to start with family and then to include if possible some friends.

Time passed. Days flied and even months went on.

Madhukar remained busy. After Six months, one Friday night, I received his call. Well, I knew his voice but I could sense the difference in it. Madhukar asked about my schedule for Sunday. I was keen to meet him. I wanted to know, if Madhukar was able to sort his problem and could come out of his depression.

Sunday I met him at his place. I was welcomed with the cheerful smile of Parvati. Her face was glowing with charm. She looked full of life. There was a surprise for me. I met Madhukar, who looked so different now. So happy and said, “You know, I learnt to manage my time.”

I thanked Madhukar for teaching me a wonderful lesson. Because of him, I realized that inner capability are so strong that they can settle the tussle if any faced in life with corrective measures and actions. Also responsibilities are taken to show your capability but no responsibility should hide your qualities or become so burdensome that restricts you from exhibiting your potentiality.

  

Real vs Animated

#Interview – the word has lost its real meaning; rather it is now considered as a word which leads to depression, panic and phobia to few. While training the post-graduate students, of one of the reputed B-Schools in New Delhi, to prepare them with certain dos and don’ts of interview, as a trainer I realized that the real problem is always overlooked due to unawareness. Students have animated some different thoughts which were far-behind the real life situation. Students were not afraid of interaction, instead they felt nervous about their appearance, body language and what not, which do matter but are of least importance when compared to knowledge and the art of communication.

Students failed to realize that life is certainly so colorful with new position, new ideas and vibrant thoughts. In the midst of unseen complexities, you often try to sail across the hindrances and overcome the difficulties. At some instances, you are quick to notice the change within the given situation and you take prompt action to respond and act according to the situation. But this is not possible every time. Then what should be the remedy for such a problem. Here are few of my captured observations:

Steadfast - don't change your character:

Value your character. You are born with an identity and throughout your life you struggle hard to improvise yourself. You take classes and attend school to nurture your knowledge skills, apply some norms to get yourself disciplined and carve your persona by working over your personal skills and traits. The fact is - some are born with you that you might have acquired genetically and you can consider yourself as blessed because of its possession. But there are numerous qualities which you wish to cultivate. You imbibe them learn from your peer group, society or even through your developing sense organs.

To change is not bad. Indeed it can be the demand of time but simply copying certain things without examining its affect over your persona, can certainly be – a matter of caution which needs to be addressed carefully. Behold your character. Do not change just for the sake of others. Try to justify your learning.

Believe in real but not animated:

Emotions play a significant role when you talk about your personality. Whenever you get an opportunity to present your persona, try not to be the part of reel but showcase your real self. Keep the animated life miles away from your thought process because the moment your thinking gets diluted you will lose the authentic color of life. Remember always that your thought will trigger your action. If you highlight and allow the positive thought to flow, you will surely feel the positive impact of the same even in your action otherwise it will be vice-versa.

Know your boons than banes:

Look always at the positive side of yourself. Things can be observed and can be presented through different dimensions. Your perspective may not be the same like that of others. Hence when others disagree or deny admitting consensus with your statement, don’t lose your level of confidence. You should be proud that you can at least put-forth your opinion. This is rather a boon but in general a student considers it as his bane. And such instances could be many which every student should notify and keep in his remembrance which can boost his morale and will propagate his thoughts to flow in rhythm.

Compel self to compete:

Interview is an art which should be learnt. Learning is fun and it demands energy. Anything that is challenging will occupy your mind with some sort of thought process featuring either your success or failure. You should compel your mind to accept the challenge and tread even the difficult ways, leaving behind your doubts and confusion. Don’t let your thought demotivate you. Only you can force yourself to face the situation which could be in your favor and sometimes contradicting your expectation, in adverse situation. Compel self to compete and face the fact as this will in turn creates awareness related to your key strengths areas and the developmental areas, which demands for the extra effort from your end to improvise.

Practice before performance:

Any action that you do should be well rehearsed and practiced before its real-time application. You should not forget that chance lost once is lost forever. You need to be truly accountable. Count every step of your action. See that you reap maximum benefit out of your performance. To practice, try to generate real-life condition, don’t search for the comfort. Get accustomed to discomfort and look for the right guidance that can act as a harbinger and can take you safely through the obstacles led in your path of success due to ignorance.

The present education system has surely adopted new pedagogy. There is huge improvement in its curriculum but let these institutions not forget the fact that they are dealing with human which certainly gets carried away by emotions and feeling. The session on soft skills and life skills are meant to hone the character and develop skills that can make the student fit for the employment.

Session on personality development demands for more activities and involvement. This doesn’t mean that the trainers can have only fun but no learning. As a trainer, let us all understand the importance of our role in building and strengthening the future of our society and nation. Let us impart the session of #Soft Skills and #Life Skills with positive thought, which can infer some learning outcomes for all those students who actually become part of these sessions.

On Rainy Morning

When the morning begins with rain

It’s a pure bliss to see nature in no feign

With bright hues dancing in the thick raindrops

And enticing me to put everything to a stop.

Oh! What a sight to behold

With vital thoughts my dreams began to unfold

Nature seemed fresh and green

Flowers and leaves looked clean and serene

Buzzing bees were eager to suck

Sweet nectar least bothered of muck

Under the willow tree

I saw a boy, who was carefree

Splashing the water

With fun and totter

Croaking frog, hidden birds

Even the animals in herd

Thank God for the pattering rain

Appeared as boon, cutting the bane

My Experience at Teachers' Training

#Passion without any intention to learn and update will certainly be of no use for the teachers to teach in the class. It was a different experience for me. 230 Km away from Delhi, in the state of Punjab there is a small village named Budhlada. I was invited by the Principal of a School to address their school teachers as well as create awareness related to the latest developments in the teaching #pedagogy. The school management has taken due care to update its school with smart class, usage of latest technology and well-furnished computer and language laboratory. I was mesmerized by the view of the school. The class rooms were well-ventilated, school was surrounded by big trees and it was green everywhere.

I thought, how lucky the students are, the one who have enrolled for their education in such well-built and developed schools. Let me confess hear that I did not expect to see such developed school in one of the interiors of Indian village. Their ambience touched my heart. I was asked by the Principal to interact with the teachers for an hour. I started my session.

I congratulated the Principal, School Management who have started such school at Budhlada that too an English medium school where the people spoke Punjabi - as this was their common language. My introductory speech was in English. When I went on speaking for few minutes, I saw principal walking to the dais beside me and he softly said in my ears that all the teachers may not understand English so I better communicate in Hindi (the national language of India).

I was surprised to hear his request. It was an English medium school where teachers were supposed to teach in #English but they failed to understand English. I found it difficult to connect the dots. Well, I realized the reason behind the invitation.

I wanted to know the problem, analyze its root cause and then thought of sharing suggestible solution to address the problem.

While interacting with the teachers I came across certain interesting facts:

• Though the teachers wanted to learn and improve their communication skills, but due to lack of platform or unavailability of proper aid, they still remain deprived of this skill.
• They have studied in English medium school where their teachers have taught them everything in Punjabi or Hindi.
• They had huge appetite to learn but they failed to fulfill their need due to lack of support from the peer group.
• Time remains a big constraint

I thought, this is certainly a common problem faced by all the schools established in the interiors of India.

I considered the given platform as my blessing. Though I was asked to interact for an hour, I pleaded the Management and asked them to spare their teachers for a day. I made them understand the need of various activities, significance of audio-visual aids for the teachers’ as teaching aid and I promised to mentor them and to extend my whole-soul support to nurture the passionate group to learn and excel.

While the teachers were involved into different activities and were performing as per my guidelines, I realized certain basic things which can be applicable to the whole teacher group.

1.   #Unlearn, Learn and Relearn: It is very important for the teachers to follow this rule. Unless as teachers if we do not unlearn the old and outdated methodology, we will not be able to gain and imbibe new things. Our mind has limited capacity to store and retain important things. If this mind will not get rid of useless baggage of information, it will become difficult to learn and with-hold new learning. We need to learn and update ourselves - each and every moment, also should not hesitate to relearn things. The more we practice, better will be its application and will result in positive implication.
2. To #listen is to learn: If you wish to learn then be receptive. Listen carefully whatever you can. Don’t try to be judgmental, what to listen and what not. To listen to others demand for high level of patience. If you wish to gain more information, even then you need to listen and learn.
3. Failure – stepping stone to success: Don’t hesitate to accept the shortcomings that we have in us. You fail because you have tried and then the failure will teach you the difference between the right and wrong approach. Things that you do will always add value to your learning. Sometimes you do it as per the norms and in some instances you may not follow the right methodology, hence you tend to fail. We need to remember that we learn in both the ways.

Let us try to upgrade the standard of teachers and deliver the best teaching practice. We need to remember that teachers are the pioneer. They build the personality of the future citizen which indeed builds the nation. It is desirable that we, the teachers should maintain the pace of learning and unswervingly continue our journey of continual growth and prosperity along with students.